The Six Hearts of Intimacy Presented by Scripture
- The Romantic Heart
Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits. I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride: I have gathered my myrrh and my spice.…I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey; I have drunk my wine and my milk. —Song 4:16, 5:1
The Romantic Heart gives and receives love by bonding with our eyes, stirring our spouse’s emotional imagination with our words, and creating intimacy with our time alone together.
- The Worshipping Heart
But for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and become one flesh. This is a profound mystery but I am talking about Christ and the church. —Ephesians 5:31–32
The Worshipping Heart gives and receives love by rejoicing in God’s holy presence in sexual intimacy as a couple offers one another sacrificial love and extraordinary honor.
- The Companion Heart
Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh. —Genesis 2:22–24
The Companion Heart gives and receives love through deep soul-ties, emotional camaraderie, and undying loyalty.
- The Giving Heart
The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1 Corinthians 7:3–5
The Giving Heart gives and receives love by joyfully providing for their spouse’s sexual needs and offering themselves in loving surrender.
- The Ecstatic Heart
Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone never to be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love. Why, my son, be intoxicated with another man’s wife? Why embrace the bosom of a wayward woman? —Proverbs 5:15–20
The Ecstatic Heart gives and receives love by reveling in the exquisite pleasure of sharing the sexual act with their life-long spouse.
- The Guardian Heart
You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?”…Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows. Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. —Malachi 2:14–15
The Guardian Heart gives and receives love by keeping vows of faithfulness, protecting oneness, and drawing future generations to God through sexual integrity.